Of Fear, Insecurity and Rejection: Tips on How I Overcame Rejection

We all have our share of fear. This emotion is strong in each person, depending on the subject.

But the one we all have about the same degree of is the fear or rejection. It is the common fear among humans. Be it on relationship, career or project matters, we all face this challenge on a regular basis. Some people manage to get over it in time, others seem to never get past it.

Today, we’ll discuss seven tips to help you understand this emotion and triumph over it when it hits you because that is how rejection feels like when it comes – like a truck hit.

1. ACKNOWLEDGE THE FEELING:

The first thing to do is accept that you feel rejected. Don’t try to deny it as this will only make it worse. Some people believe telling themselves they’re fine means they’re fine. Sometimes, your heart does not agree with your brain and even though you say you’re cool with it, your heart breaks whenever you remember it. You’ve been hurt, yes. Accept it and be on your way to healing. You’ll actually begin to feel better, trust me.

2. HAVE AN APPROPRIATE GRIEVING PERIOD:

It is necessary that after acknowledging, you give yourself time to go over the feeling. Don’t brush aside the hurt even when you have accepted it. You might need to shed a few tears, scream or rave about it, but be careful not to wallow in it. That is, do not spend too much time grieving. It will only make things worse. The goal of the grieving is to let out pent-up emotions. Once you’re done with that, move on to the next level.

Suggested Read: I Was Living in Fear

3. TALK ABOUT IT:

Talking about what bothers you is another trusted healing process. Psychologists and shrinks are paid huge amounts of money to listen to people talk about their problems. Find someone to talk to, preferably the person who has rejected you. Politely tell the person how you feel (remember to be positive and civil). Ask why you have been rejected.

Suggested Read: Fostering Healthy Relationships Despite Differences

You might be surprised to learn that the rejection was due to a simple, overlooked, unintentional or even unreasonable reason. The goal is to get feedback so you can avoid future rejections by him or others. If impossible to reach out to the person who rejected you, talk to another person, someone responsible or more mature who can correctly evaluate the situation and help you get better. Praying about it helps too, I assure you. That’s still talking to Someone, right?

4. DO SOMETHING DIFFERENT:

Try your hand at something else. You do not have to remain in the rejection room. This does not mean that you don’t try to make things better later. But for the healing period, something that will lift your mood or distract from the pain will help.

5. DO NOT, I REPEAT, DO NOT POST IT ON SOCIAL MEDIA:

Some people have a habit of displaying all their life on the social media. This, in the long run, won’t help. It might seem like the needed remedy but it’s only temporary. You never know who’s going to fling that post right back in your face when you least expect it. Help your readers. Help yourself. Find better ways to deal with the rejection, like the tips above and below.

6. LEARN FROM IT:

Learn from your errors. Sincerely evaluate your situation and find ways to improve. Being rejected does not mean that you’re not still the great person you are, it may just mean that you are approaching the situation all wrong. Analyse the feedback then Improve.

7. LOVE YOURSELF:

The only approval that truly matters is your self-approval. Your self-love and respect for your uniqueness will trump the negative emotions brought up by rejection. Once you’re conscious of your magnificence, rejection will lose its power. You might not feel happy about being rejected, but you will bounce back quickly. And I hope you do.

I recently experienced rejection from someone I care deeply about. No matter how much I tried, I couldn’t get over it. And I had no idea how to broach the subject without sounding like a nag. So I wrote about it.

Yes! I literally wrote my emotions on paper. By the time I was done with the fourth poem, I felt much better. Then I went back to the person to discuss it.

I even read out the poem and received great feedback. I have a friend who prefers to write letters.

You could try it too. Let’s overcome together!

Cheers!